Dating unemployed men
That's simply the nature of online dating, and even dating in general.
While what we seek in a potential mate may not vary much between the "real" and virtual worlds, dating sites highlight a particularly revealing reality about the importance of employment status, and perhaps biases people may not even realize they themselves hold.
When Maria mentioned she had quit her job a few weeks prior, but wished she were working, the response was... And then she asked what I did [for a living]." "I responded honestly that I quit my job three weeks ago, I wished I was working, and I shouldn't get too down considering I could find a great opportunity tomorrow," says Maria.
"After that message to her, I never heard back." Despite Maria's optimism, clearly neither of these prospective mates was looking for someone "in transition." Maria keeps at it though, hoping to meet someone who "sees that [she is] much more than someone currently without a job." According to Business News Daily in 2012, chances are already not pretty for the unemployed out there looking for love.
Perhaps unsurprisingly, Jason Weberman, CPCC, a dating and relationship expert with North Star Coaching, indicates a study conducted by Match.com, and his own experience, to point out women statistically value employment and financial security in a mate much more than the other way around.
Women, he notes, must compensate with "physical appearance and personality." Amber Soletti, co-founder of the NYC based dating service, On Speed Dating.com, who runs "laid off speed dating" events, confirms this gender-based phenomenon, noting twice as many men as women sign up for her events.
Instead, they said they were concerned that they might end up having to support an unemployed man.
They also said they didn't want their own activities to be limited by someone else's job status and potential financial limitations.
Still, when meeting a romantic contender in the "real world," there's at least a grain of amorous interest that, ideally, keeps either party from running for the door when they discover the other's employment situation is in shambles.All this, experts say, is changing the dating game.The current dating scene includes group dating, trolling the internet for free or cheap events to take dates and an endless array of options of other eager singles to choose from via casual texts and late-night hookups..."I feel pretty low when I'm unemployed, so I don't know if I could handle meeting someone unemployed unless they handled it exceptionally well," she says."But if this wasn't a trigger for me, yes, I would go on a date with someone who was unemployed, as long as they were being proactive about it." Tyler Tervooren, who blogs about attracting women online, agrees "self-employed" seemed to be a turn-off on his Ok Cupid profile, until he changed it to the more alluring-sounding "entrepreneur." Insofar as what bearing our economy has on dating and employment, according to Fox Business in 2013, many young people are in the same position -- times are tough economically, and people across the board are generally favorable toward the "cheap date." For the same reasons, they are increasingly putting off more serious romantic decisions until later in life.